Guide to a ripoff-free funeral

Terminal-stage capitalism for the worm-food set.

Cory Doctorow
4 min readSep 9, 2022

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A graveside casket. Dancing atop it is a drawing of Monopoly’s Rich Uncle Pennybags, but instead of a cane, he is wielding a scythe. His face has been turned into a skull. Image: Eugene Peretz (modified) https://www.flickr.com/photos/peretzpup/3370664952/ CC BY-SA 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/

In the decade-plus that I’ve been reading and watching Caitlin Doughty, I’ve become increasingly aware that even death is no escape from late-stage capitalism — indeed, if you have the misfortune to die unprepared, you will pass out of this world attended by a monopolistic, rapacious, price-gouging monopoly.

https://www.orderofthegooddeath.com/

Indeed, the situation is so grim that I’ve often joked about leaving my body to med-school pranks: corpse at the alumni dinner, arm hanging from a toll-booth, etc. But for the mourners whose grief is turned into cash, this is no laughing matter.

Writing today for Propublica, Carson Kessler delivers an essential piece of service journalism: “How to Avoid Being Overcharged for a Funeral,” whose advice and analysis is exactly the kind of clear guidance needed to carry you through a very difficult moment:

https://www.propublica.org/article/how-to-negotiate-funeral-costs-qa

The funeral home industry is governed by a set of reasonably good regulations, but you only benefit from this if you know about them. Kessler turns to Joshua Slocum, of the Funeral Consumers Alliance to explain them:

  • You have the right to get a quote by…

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